He is warmth and laughter and muscles and blonde hair and a smile that will make your knees go weak. He is the reason that I get the butterflies in my stomach, the reason I cannot eat. He is hot coffee and a sexy tattoo and long legs and a no-nonsense haircut. He is the one who will be found studying in the sunlight, totally immersed in his work. He is the one with the warm smile that scares me. I haven’t been scared in a long time: life had forced me to bury my emotions so deep that that I thought they were dead. But now i feel the butterflies, feel the sunlight, smell his coffee, and admire the simplistic enigma that is this man. A man I can never have. And although it hurts I will not bury these emotions. I will feel them as deeply as I can, because I am grateful to feel again.